Make your pleasure your priority  

One key to sexual confidence is that you are capable of fulfilling yourself and you do not need to rely on a partner for pleasure.  Ask yourself this question: when you are with a partner do you think more about giving them pleasure instead of ensuring your pleasure is of equal importance?   Women often have difficulty in asking their partners to touch them in a certain way and it is so important for every woman to know what drives her pleasure so she can communicate freely.  

Get in touch with your body 

Make a list of your desires, likes and dislikes. (Casual sex? Roleplaying? Where do you like to be touched?) When it’s clear to you, you can make it clear to your partner(s), too. Whether you are in a relationship or not, taking the time to get in touch with your own body and exploring your pleasure zones will empower you to feel more comfortable being touched or asking for arousal.   

Masturbate regularly 

Despite what you might have been told to believe growing up, Masturbation is completely normal!  When you take your sexual pleasure into your own hands (literally!) you are moving forward into your sexual independence. People of all genders and sexual orientations masturbate. Sexual exploration is a healthy part of being human, and a very important part of cultivating self-love. There is no ideal recipe—you are perfect exactly how you are, how you touch yourself and wie oft.  Masturbation boosts your sexual confidence and helps you get in tune with your body, as well as releasing some great hormones that are so very beneficial to your mental health.  Still need convincing to masturbate regularly?  Check out our list of health benefits: 

1. Stimulation + sexual arousal schaltet den logischen Teil unseres Gehirns ab und verringert so Angst und Unruhe 
2. Beim Orgasmus werden Wohlfühlhormone freigesetzt   Dopamin (beteiligt an Lustgefühlen und dem Belohnungssystem) und Oxytocin (fördert Gefühle von Liebe, Zuneigung und Zufriedenheit) 
3. During + after arousal, orgasm activates some of the same brain areas as pain and may reduce your pain sensitivity 
4. Women’s brains continue releasing Oxytocin after sexual arousal is over, resulting in a desire to get cozy and cuddle 
5. Orgasm facilitates the release of serotonin, a hormone that promotes a good mood and can help you feel happy, calm, or even sleepy 

Self-Affirm to Take a Stand Against Shame  

Did you know that 85% of women choose to opt out of life activities because they don’t feel good about the way they look?    Body shaming and public pressure to be perfect starts as early as 13 when young girls say they are unhappy with their bodies and soars to 78% by the time they reach 17.  Whether it was from our parents, our culture, and/or that horrible high school sex ed class, we realize that many people have encountered feelings of shame regarding body image, sex, and masturbation.  Say it again with us: Your sexual impulses are healthy and human. You deserve to feel safe, happy, and loved. You are entitled to healthy sexual exploration (always with consent).  Say it to your face in the mirror. Say it to your stretch marks. The next time someone wants to tell you otherwise, tell them to mind their own body’s business 😊  

Cultivating Self-Love and Confidence

When finding time to decompress, you may not be incentivized by the many things that require our time (think bills, career, family); therefore cultivating self-love through wellness and mindfulness are more crucial than ever.  Pass auf dich auf means prioritizing your mental, physical and emotional health. Not only does this commitment create a ripple effect in your relationships, but it will also help you get more Vergnügen.  We know it’s not as easy as saying, “Okay, it’s time to love myself!” Instead, prioritizing your needs is part of cultivating self-love and respect for the long term. 

When women realize that their bodies and sexualities belong exclusively to them, they achieve sexual independence and can have sex on their terms because they feel sexually confident.  At Erosscia we believe everyone has the right to playful self-expression and that we are responsible for achieving that no matter what, who or how we identify.  However you choose to redefine your pleasure this Independence Day, we celebrate your sexual freedom with you!