Sex and masturbation are often considered two different types of sexual activity. One is done with a partner while the other is done alone. However, the line is blurrier than that, with both crossing the boundaries. The best example is mutual masturbation which involves a partner, but where each person touches themselves.
There are enduring myths about mutual masturbation such as that it’s an immature type of sex that only teenagers or college kids do. But, mutual masturbation can spice up anyone’s sex life and is one of the best ways to stay connected to a long-distance partner.
What Is Mutual Masturbation?
As previously mentioned, mutual masturbation is essentially masturbating within the view of partner(s). Participants may use their hands, sex toys, or even other objects when engaging in mutual masturbation. While most probably picture laying side by side and masturbating, it can be much more intimate and fulfilling. When partaking in mutual masturbation, vibrators and other toys are commonly used. Though, they are not necessary.
Like traditional sex, there are several positions for mutual masturbation. There are also positions for virtual masturbation such as squatting which is easy to set up and do on camera. Some of the possible positions include:
Side-by-Side: This accessible position is perfect for anyone who may feel a little embarrassed. It allows partners to look away easily if needed or focus more on the sounds than the sight of masturbation. This is often considered the “default” position.
- Front Facing: For those who want a bolder approach, facing each other can elevate the experience by bringing in an element of voyeurism and frequent eye contact. The partners can sit or stand in this position. They can also sit as close or far apart as they like bringing a new element to the experience.
- Missionary: The traditional sex position can make mutual masturbation even hotter! With one partner on top and the other underneath pleasuring themselves, this brings in elements of skin-to-skin contact and can feel like regular sex, but without penetration. This position is also conducive to the use of sex toys.
- Squatting: This position is great if using a penetrative sex toy. It also can be done in person or virtually. The other partner can take on whatever position they like. Squatting is versatile because it can be done in close quarters to one another, from across the room, or on FaceTime. It does tend to work better for people with vaginas, but anyone can try mutual masturbation in this position.
- Sitting: Another versatile position, sitting can involve a camera, facing one another, facing away, toys or no toys, and endless other options. It is also another good position for beginners or those with disabilities. The position is comfortable and relaxed without making it difficult to get the job done.
- Standing: Mutual masturbation while standing is a power move. It almost feels like a game of who will fall to their knees first. The physical endurance and difficulty of masturbating while standing for some make this a somewhat advanced position for some couples. This is also an ideal position for gay cisgender men who can easily masturbate while standing.
The possible mutual masturbation positions are endless. Get creative and try some of your favorite sex positions, but with mutual masturbation. It can fulfill many desires without being too risky or unapproachable for a partner who may be hesitant. Of course, all sexual activities, including mutual masturbation must be done with consent, but mutual masturbating is a great way to work up to other activities.
For example, voyeurism is sometimes stigmatized, but this is a safe, easy, and accessible way to try it out before committing to it during sex. Other kinks that may benefit from trying out during mutual masturbation include exhibitionism, phone sex, roleplaying, and threesomes or multiple partners.
Mutual masturbation combines the benefits of sex and masturbation into one. Of course, some people are simply not going to be into mutual masturbation which is perfectly understandable. Some of the possible benefits include:
- More likely to orgasm (you know what you like!)
- Increased intimacy with your partner(s)
- Stress relief
- Ability to try out new things with less pressure
- Learn how to better please your partner(s)
- Great way to introduce/try out sex toys
- Can be done over the phone or through video chat
- Stimulates other forms of sexual pleasure such as audio (hearing your partner or listening to something together)
- Better sleep
- Increased confidence
- Accessible and versatile
- No equipment is needed (though you can certainly use it!)
- Work to overcome vulnerabilities
Reasons To Try Mutual Masturbation
If you and your partner(s) are open to trying mutual masturbation, there is no wrong time to try and spice it up in the bedroom (or Zoom call). Here are five reasons to try it out tonight.
#1: Less Likely To Spread Disease
Mutual masturbation–since limited or no contact occurs–is less likely to spread disease, both sexually transmitted diseases and others. With that said, it is still possible to get a sexually transmitted disease from mutual masturbation due to the sharing of toys or if the bodies/genitals are close enough to one another. Mutual masturbation is not a replacement for safe and responsible sex, but if your partner has a cold and you still want to get it on, mutual masturbation can help limit your chances of getting sick.
If you plan to share a toy during mutual masturbation, consider placing and replacing condoms on the toy between uses. Always thoroughly clean toys after sex and follow basic guidelines for safe sex even though mutual masturbation does cut the risk of getting an STI significantly.
#2: Can Be IRL Or Virtually
As hinted at a few times before in this article, mutual masturbation is one of the easiest ways to virtually have sex. You and your partner can enjoy the sounds and sights of one another’s pleasure from thousands of miles away. You can do it over a phone call, video chat, or even through texts while masturbating. For couples living long distance or apart due to traveling, mutual masturbation provides a way to still intimately connect and be sexually satisfied.
Additionally, mutual masturbation was highly endorsed as a way to remain sexually active and satisfied during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic. Even the government in New South Wales Australia recommended mutual masturbation during lockdowns.
#3: It’s Playful
Mutual masturbation opens up endless opportunities to switch it up and explore one another’s bodies. Blindfolds, vibrators, dirty talk, roleplaying, and group sex are all examples of what you can try with mutual masturbation. Certain sex toys cater to mutual masturbation by creating toys that the opposite partner controls.
Maintaining playfulness in a sexual relationship often leads to a more fulfilling sex life. Not only does it keep things fresh, but it can help each partner work through the vulnerabilities they may have surrounding sex.
#4: No Limit On Partners
Mutual masturbation is not an activity that limits the number of people who can join. It requires a minimum of two people but can have many more than that. While group sex is not a new concept, mutual masturbation orgies certainly are not often talked about. They can take place alongside a traditional orgy or can be the sole purpose of the event itself.
As previously mentioned, if you and a partner are interested in adding another person to the bedroom, mutual masturbation is the perfect way to try it out. Not only does it allow you and your partner to determine your comfort level with the idea, but it also can help gauge the chemistry you have with the other party to ensure an ongoing and satisfying sexual relationship.
#5: Can Be Foreplay (But Doesn’t Have To Be!)
Some couples like to use mutual masturbation as foreplay. This makes total sense because both the stimulation from the physical masturbation as well as watching and hearing your partner experience gratification can get anyone in the mood for something more. Perhaps mutual masturbation is foreplay one day and the main event the next. Incorporating it into your sex life instead of making it your sex life is the perfect way to enjoy any sexual experience.
Erosscia Vibrators For You & Your Partner
Erosscia vibrators are ideal for mutual masturbation, solo masturbation, and traditional sexual activities. Their ease of use and the long length when connected to the toothbrush base make it an accessible sex toy. All of Erosscia’s vibrators are not limited to genital or anal stimulation. The vibrator can activate the erogenous zones or give a massage. Like mutual masturbation, this makes Erosscia’s vibrators extremely versatile for any and all sex you may partake in.
You can find out more about our products and purchase them in our online shop. They ship worldwide and are one of the most affordable vibrators on the market. Get you and your partner an Erosscia to try out during your next mutual masturbation sesh!