Women Love Women: Threesomes, Lesbian Sex, & Other Things Women Like In Porn

Historically, within a Eurocentric context, a woman’s sexuality condemned her to ostracization, loss of reputation, or, worst cases, barbaric medical procedures. Of course, this did not mean that women did not enjoy or seek out sex, masturbate, or explore their sexuality. Instead, it meant they had to hide it and be discreet. Due to a woman’s sexuality being considered grotesque in nature, a woman’s pleasure was also not valued by their male partners. In the Victorian era, female orgasms were deemed unhealthy and unnecessary.

Even in the 20th century, Married Love by Marie Stopes–which identified and advocated for the female orgasm and pleasure–was banned in the US. Freud considered clitoral orgasms “immature” and it was not until 1998 that the structure of the clitoris would be mapped or understood [source]. While it would be unfair to say that men simply did not care about their female partner’s pleasure, even today only 64% of women orgasm compared to 91% of men during a sexual encounter.

Today, in most places, women can express some aspects of their sexuality—however, derogatory terms for women still largely center around sexual promiscuity. Victims of sexual abuse often are not taken seriously because male sexuality is considered more primal and women should expect abuse if they dress or act provocatively. This is all to say that society still undervalues female pleasure, even if it is in a more subtle way that allows women to more openly express parts of their sexuality.

With the historical and societal connotations in mind, it is not surprising that what women like in porn, how they consume it, and their overall relationship to it tends to vary from men.

How Women Consume Porn

In the digital age, we generally think of pornographic videos as the main way to consume porn. However, people of all eras had porn and new ways of finding and absorbing pornographic content. While men can comfortably read Playboy or discuss their favorite porn stars, women have not always had that luxury. Generally, women–regardless of age, race, or socioeconomic class–must consume porn discreetly.

Due to this, women do not just watch porn. They read, listen, write, and partake in pornographic chat rooms. Men do these things too, but to a much lesser extent. Here are a few statistics:

• Women are more likely to read erotica and listen to audio porn [source]
• 95% of erotica readership comes from women [source]
• 90% of women use their imagination to get turned on [source]
• Women become more aroused by the context or story of the porn than the visuals [source]
• Less body shaming and self-doubt occur with non-video forms of porn [source]

Using one’s imagination when reading or listening to erotica allows women to better insert themselves into the narrative and imagine it exactly as they want. Additionally, these forms of porn are increasingly made for women. The majority of erotica writers are women and audio porn largely targets women.

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Porn, in general, is seeing more women creators. Instead of simply acting in porn videos or being directed, women now can make porn on their own and make a decent living. Allowing women to have control over the porn they create makes it more enjoyable for them and the watcher. It also prioritizes ethically produced and more realistic porn. With more women making porn, more women are interested in and satisfied by porn.

What Women Like In Porn

What women like in porn may be among the most surprising. According to statistics gathered from PornHub and other similar websites/platforms, porn trends among women include:

• Women are 40% more likely to view threesome videos and they search more for “FFM” or “female, female, male” than “FMM”
• “Lesbian” is the top search term on Pornhub for women
• Women tend to search more for gay or bisexual pornstars
• 7% of gay male porn is watched by women
• The top five searched pornstars among women in 2022 were all women
• Women seek out penetration porn less, preferring watching videos that involve the vulva

It is not only lesbian and bisexual women watching and enjoying woman-on-woman porn. Straight women also enjoy lesbian porn and may even specifically seek it out. In a Woman’s Health article, a sex researcher provides some of the reasons why.

Firstly, both lesbian and gay porn do not relent to the heterosexual male gaze as much as most straight porn does. This is more appealing to women of all sexualities, especially lesbian porn because it centers on clitoral and vaginal pleasure. Considering most women cannot orgasm without some sort of clitoral stimulation, it is understandable that women would seek this out in porn.

Lesbian porn is often more realistic. It features more body types, foreplay, sex toys, softer sex, and is easier to relate to for most women even if they do not have sex with other women. Also, in general, society allows women to experiment more with their sexuality. While this may seem counterintuitive to a society that often represses female sexuality, lesbian porn is better received by straight men than gay porn. Ultimately, this makes it more acceptable simply because straight men are often aroused by it. However, there is also less shame involved if a woman finds sexual pleasure in another woman than if a man finds it with another man. This is likely due to toxic ideals of masculinity.

Essentially, women like watching lesbian porn because it allows them to better imagine their own pleasure. It can also be refreshing to see a woman’s pleasure without the male gaze. When it comes to other porn preferences, women consistently are into threesomes and multiples. Many of the same reasons explained above may apply, such as society allowing women to have a more fluid sexuality. In fact, over half of straight-identifying women said they were or had been attracted to women.

This curiosity is often a natural part of discovering and exploring sexuality, regardless of gender identity. However, women may hold onto same sex and threesome fantasies even if they identify as heterosexual and do not partake in those activities within their own sex life.

The Takeaways

Women like porn. They do not make up the majority of porn video watchers, but they dominate other forms of porn such as written erotica. Women also rely more on their imagination to find sexual satisfaction or fulfillment from porn. Therefore, they may gravitate towards mediums such as audio and fiction for their porn. Additionally, women tend to be more open in what they consume. Not only do they consume more same sex porn, but they also watch more hardcore porn than men.

Women like to see a woman’s pleasure during sex in a way that is realistic and which minimizes the male gaze. This may look like focusing more on the clitoris or only featuring women in the porn. Seeing other women have fun and orgasm can lead to arousal.

Ultimately, whether or not a woman watches or consumes porn, the shame around women doing so is slowly decreasing. Through platforms such as OnlyFans and social media, women can make money off making their own porn within their own boundaries. Women’s sexuality also has become more public-facing with sex toys mentioned in sitcoms and the feminist porn movement.

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